Warning. FHN has been invaded by Oopma Loompas. I’m not talking about short, fat men with green hair; I’m talking about people that tan until their skin color is bright orange.

In case you were mistaken, it is January, which means people don’t lounge by the pool soaking up the rays. Clearly you have had a little help from our friends at the tanning salon. I don’t really understand why people think this shade looks good. Somebody needs to call Charlie Brown because I found the great pumpkin, and she wasn’t pretty.

It’s okay to go tanning and have a little color so that you don’t look like a ghost, but when people start to compare you to their favorite citrus fruits, that’s when you should draw the line. I am saying this because I care about you. Not only do you look ridiculous, you are putting yourself at risk of getting melanoma.  So let’s try and stop the Oompa Loompa infestation for the good of all.