The house is peaceful as Linda and Dennis Boll enjoy their dinner. While they are eating, the phone rings, and Linda gets up to answer it. It is the case worker of Linda and Dennis’ soon to be daughter, Iesha. Linda and Dennis were being informed that Iesha was ready to be adopted, and the Bolls were thrilled. They told their son Vasko one week before Iesha moved in about his new sibling. Asked about having a sister, he excitedly agreed.
Iesha and her brother Vasko are both adopted. They’re the only two children of Linda and Dennis. Unlike some couples, Linda and Dennis did not chose to adopt very young children. Iesha and Vasko were both in elementary school during the adoption process. They remember it all, including the transition of becoming part of a new family- a transition both accepted very well.
“They knew [they were being adopted],” Dennis said. “We told them we wanted to adopt them, and we asked for their approval. They appeared to like [being adopted] and were willing to call us Mom and Dad after a short period of time.”
The adoption process is long, and it was different for each child. Iesha, who is currently a freshman at FHN, was adopted locally, from Kentucky. Her adoption process started when Dennis and Linda got a call from Iesha’s case worker, saying that Iesha would be up for adoption. From there, Linda and Dennis adopted Iesha through the Missouri Division of Family Services. Before Iesha’s adoption was finalized, she stayed with her new family for six months and once a week, a social worker would come to make sure the family was happy.
“I think the best thing about being adopted is how you know you have a loving family that can take care of you,” Iesha said.
Vasko, who is 24, was adopted outside of the United States. He came from Bulgaria and became Dennis and Linda’s first child when he was 11. Dennis and Linda were first told about Vasko by their good friends, who described Vasko as a young boy from Bulgaria who needed to be adopted. That’s when Linda and Dennis decided they wanted to adopt Vasko through a private service. Since Vasko was 11 when he was adopted, there wasn’t much Dennis and Linda needed to explain to him about what was going on.
“I knew,” Vasko said. “I was old enough to know what was going on.”
Even though adoption is a very long process, and it can be stressful, there are many ups to it, according to the Bolls. Dennis thinks one positive aspect of adoption is adopting older children. When you adopt an older child, they can decide for themselves if they want to be adopted. Linda, however, likes other aspects of adoption.
“You get all the love without the pain of child birth,” Linda said.
Vasko and Iesha both agree that having a caring family is the absolute best part of adoption. But of course, not everything about adoption can be great. There’s the six month waiting period, negative opinions on adoption from others and the children not being with their actual birth mother.
“The worst thing about being adopted is, well, I don’t think there is one,” Iesha said. “Maybe that you aren’t with the woman who gave birth to you, but I have a very good family now.”
With all the ups and downs, the Bolls view adoption as well worth it. It helps a lot of kids in need of a family and, according to the Bolls, it’s a great thing to do.
“We would recommend adoption,” Dennis said. “There’s a lot of people in great need, especially the older kids.”
