Walking into 18-year-old Brandi Purvey’s home, immediately to the left sits a black and tan play pen. Upstairs, the first door on the right is Brandi’s room. The room is decorated with a few pictures of her and her friends, a crib, baby clothes, and so many toys and diapers that tubs will soon be needed to store them in. The baby supplies have been acquired over the past ten months. The majority of them came from a family hosted baby shower and from family and friends on the day Brandi’s daughter London Cherrelle Purvey was born.
Monday, Feb. 21, 2011 at 7 a.m., Brandi woke up with sharp pains and a hard time breathing. She immediately called her nurse and rushed to the hospital, where it was decided an emergency C section was needed to deliver her daughter.
“When she called me I was really scared because she was crying,” Brandi’s mom Leslie Miller said. “I thought something was really wrong, but she was just really upset about having to get a C section. I was just trying to calm her down and let her know that it was okay.”
At 11:15 a.m., after Brandi was put to sleep, the surgery began.
“I was crying and going crazy,” Brandi said. “I was angry because I wanted the experience to have a natural birth.”
When Brandi woke up in the ICU, about an hour after her surgery, her first thought was “I want to see my baby.” Her mother, step-father and a family friend were in the room when she woke up, and her family and friends soon flowed into the room while a nurse brought London from the nursery to see her mom for the first time.
“Thank you, God,” Brandi’s grandmother Joyce Haller said. “He has brought us another beautiful baby.”
Looking back over her pregnancy, it’s hard for Brandi to believe that just 10 months ago she had to do what she believes was one of the hardest things she’s had to experience so far in her life- tell her mom that she was pregnant.
“I was scared,” Brandi said. “I knew what my mom would think and how disappointed she would be.”
Hours after taking a pregnancy test, Brandi arrived home late one August night, walked into her room, sat on her bed and called her mom into the room.
“What’s wrong Brandi?” Leslie asked when she entered.
Brandi couldn’t speak- she just sat crying. Silence followed as Leslie waited on the bed, wondering what could possibly be bothering her daughter so much.
“She took a while to tell me,” Leslie said. “At first I didn’t know what she wanted to tell me. Then as time went by, I started fearing for
the worst.”
About 30 minutes after she called in her mom, Brandi was finally able to get out the words, “I’m pregnant.”
“When I finally told her, I felt a little relief but not a lot because I knew I would never hear the end of it,” Brandi said.
Her mother’s face conveyed a message that Brandi will never forget- disbelief, anger and hurt. She remembers the three minutes of silence that followed and what her mom said when she left.
“I can’t believe you. You have so many dreams, and how could you let this happen?”
Brandi remembers clearly that sleep did not come easily that night, knowing that the conversation with her mom was not over. The next morning they talked about various issues surrounding the pregnancy. To confirm the home pregnancy test, Brandi and her mother went to the OB/GYN the next day. When the results came back positive, Brandi was shocked to know she was definitely going to be a mom. With this affirmation, Brandi and her mom began telling family and friends that she was pregnant; the reactions were all the same.
“I was disappointed for the loss of things that cannot be done because the responsibility is now the child, and she couldn’t go off to college, do girl things, travel,” Joyce said. “Disappointed because she had to take on adult responsibilities before she had a chance to be a single adult.”
Despite their initial reactions, Brandi’s mother and her grandma, who she accredits as being her biggest supporters through her pregnancy, rose quickly to do whatever was best for Brandi and the baby.
“They were disappointed at first,” Brandi said, “But you can’t stay disappointed for long because it is what it is, and you can’t change it.”
Over the past 10 months her relationship with her mother and grandma has grown, and the immediate thought of disappointment has morphed into the biggest web of support Brandi could have asked for.
“I love them to death,” Brandi said. “They’ve been through a lot with me; they support me. They might have been mad at me for what happened, but at the end of the day they have my back. I’m just blessed to have so many people in my life right now helping with London and finishing school. I don’t know where I would be without them.”
With a little less than a month left until graduation Brandi’s days continue to revolve around working hard in school and taking care of London. The last few weeks of school will be hard, and she knows that things will be more difficult for her, but with the continued support of her mom and grandma she feels that she will be able to achieve her goals.
“I am looking forward to graduating and walking with the seniors,” Brandi said. “I am looking forward to bringing her up like my mom and my grandma did for me, with my morals and values of life and watching her grow.”
Brandi herself has grown a lot over the past months, showing strength that her family didn’t know she had. A more mature Brandi left the hospital with London in tow. More mature from the one who was scared to tell her mom that she was pregnant, more mature than the Brandi who was managing school, night classes, doctor’s appointments and work while pregnant. The Brandi that left the hospital is more prepared for the challenges that life brings and has a different mind-set and a new look on life. She is ready to pursue her goals.
“I am encouraged that she is still holding on to her dreams and that she still has her faith in God,” Joyce said. “We have gotten closer, providing more support for Brandi and the baby. Just seeing her demonstrate the strength that I didn’t know she had, I think we’ve changed in a positive way.”
By: Sidney Shelton
